Beloved through Discipleship

Today’s reading is the same as yesterday due to the leap year: Exodus 11–12:21; Luke 14; Job 29; 1 Corinthians 15

As today is leap day I’ve been invited to “freestyle” in my scripture reflection for Bible Journal. Last week there were so many rich reflections on Passover and the surrounding scripture in Exodus. I’m tempted to write more about the ancient tradition of Passover and it’s representation now in our modern lives. In Exodus 12 the Lord commands Moses and Aaron that the Israelites must slaughter one lamb per household. This lamb must be without blemish, male and be one year old. As I considered this sacrifice and the cost to each Israelite family, I challenged myself to ask: what is our modern lamb? What is it that God is asking of us as individuals? What is he asking our modern households to contribute, in order to be counted among His chosen ones?

As I read and re-read the scripture readings for yesterday my heart has continually come back to the idea of discipleship. In Luke 14 beginning in verse 25 Jesus talks about the cost of discipleship:

“If anyone comes to me and does not hate his own father and mother and wife and children and brothers and sisters, yes, and even his own life, he cannot be my disciple. Whoever does not bear his own cross and come after me cannot be my disciple. For which of you, desiring to build a tower, does not first sit down and count the cost, whether he has enough to complete it?” Luke 14: 26-28

 Ultimately, wasn’t God asking the Israelites to cast off the securities of their world; their best lamb in exchange for discipleship with Him? And they, living by the very definition of faith (what cannot be seen or heard) made this corporeal sacrifice without hesitation. Are WE able to do this? Are we as Christians making daily decisions that lead us to discipleship? I often find myself living in dichotomy, my Sunday morning convictions fading into Tuesday and Wednesday’s trials. I am quick to look to my husband, my parents, my friends and my colleagues for discipleship. I imagine that what Jesus is asking of us is to discipline ourselves in discipleship with him. In verse 27 he speaks of “bearing his own cross” which isn’t really related to carrying our own burdens but actually a reference to the Romans forcing a convicted criminal to carry his own cross to his execution. Jesus wanted his followers to understand that committing to a life with him and in him means total submission.

As people we want to feel connected, we fear isolation and loneliness. We stumble through daily life searching for that lasting connection. I find myself looking for it in my marriage relationship, my family relationships and with friends. I also, if I’m being honest, seek it in relationships with things like food, electronics and trendy clothes. Jesus is speaking to us through Luke’s words, reminding us that when we seek oneness with Him then we will finally experience what it means to be beloved.

I’m currently reading a wonderful book by a Catholic priest entitled, “Life of the Beloved: Spiritual Living in a Secular World” by Henri Nouwen. In the first chapter he defines the meaning of being beloved.

“Aren’t you, like me, hoping that some person, thing or event will come along to give you that final feeling of inner well being you desire? Don’t you often hope: “May this book, idea, course, trip, job, country, or relationship fulfill my deepest desire.” But as long as you are waiting for that mysterious moment you will go on running helter-skelter, always anxious and restless, always lustful and angry, never fully satisfied. You know that this is the compulsiveness that keeps us going and busy, but at the same time makes us wonder whether we are getting anywhere in the long run. This is the way to spiritual exhaustion and burn-out. This is the way to spiritual death. Well, you and I don’t have to kill ourselves. We are the Beloved. We are intimately loved long before our parents, spouses, teachers, children and friends loved or wounded us. That is the truth of our lives and the truth I want you to claim for yourself. That’s the truth spoken by the voice that says, “You are my Beloved” ~Henri J.M. Nouwen

 We hear this word so many times in different contexts but to me it is spoken most directly to us in Romans 9

“…even us whom he has called, not only from the Jews only but also from the Gentiles? As indeed he says in Hosea: “Those who were not my people, I will call ‘my people’ and her who was not beloved I will call ‘beloved’” Romans 9:24-25

 WE are his people. He is inviting us to bring our modern lambs to slaughter. He asks us to search ourselves and then discipline ourselves into discipleship with Him. Not in the spirit of penance and punishment but in the seeking of that ultimate joy and relief of being His Beloved. As we live these “Passover days” I like to imagine our heavenly Father sweeping his gaze over our roofs, looking for signs of obedience and genuine desire to be in communion with Him. I imagine what that looks like to Him in terms of surrender of my worldly security for His everlasting love. As we wait patiently for the resurrection, it’s maybe not the cold, dark and grey days suggesting deprivation we are meant to soak in. Perhaps, it’s an invitation to seek an inner attentiveness to His voice.

“Fear not, I have redeemed you; I have called you by name, you are mine.” Isaiah 43:1





Today’s reading:  Exodus 11–12:21; Luke 14; Job 29; 1 Corinthians 15

Don’t we all want deliverance from something? Maybe not all the time, but at some point in our lives, being set free from some kind of oppression, or being spared some form of hardship, is a big deal. What would it mean for us, if in those times, our problems just passed over us?

In today’s reading, Moses warns of another great plague. This time, Pharaoh is told that death will come to each firstborn throughout the land — simply terrifying!

Moses then instructs the Israelite’s to sacrifice a spotless lamb, and by marking their doors with its blood, they will be delivered from this final plague upon Egypt. Then they are told to prepare and roast the lamb and eat, in celebratation of the first feast of the Lord’s Passover. It is a feast that signifies many things; the connection between sacrifice and atonement, the deliverance of God’s people, and it also marks the fresh beginning of the new year. But the one thing I find most remarkable, is how it foreshadows the sacrifice of Jesus, a real person (filled with the Holy Spirit) who came into the world for the purpose of reconciling man to God, delivering us from our sin and the law, and giving us a fresh start. Christians across the world believe Jesus to be the Divine, spotless, sacrificial, “Lamb of God.” 

The next day John saw Jesus coming toward him and said, “look, the Lamb of God, who takes away the sin of the world! -John 1:29

Christ followers are also called to live lives of sacrifice. But what is it are we called to sacrifice (and why)?  In a word–everything. This can be a very disturbing thought, especially if we have a lot of stuff, and we love our lives — the very things that get in our way when we try to get closer to God.  We are called to release our claim of ownership and control of these earthly treasures, as well as our comforts and pride.  Interestingly, by letting go of things that do not give us true peace, or eternal security, we find ourselves better able to receive the wisdom, and the lasting peace promised in the Bible. Ironically, in the struggle to hold on to these things too tightly, we are also able to see and hear from God. For me, this has come in the anxiety of trying to control the world that I want to build for myself, or in the disappointment and lack of deeper fulfillment that results from feeding my flesh, my ego or my treasury.

I declare to you brothers, that flesh and blood cannot inherit the kingdom of God, nor does the perishable inherit the imperishable. –1Corinthians 15:50

God in His wisdom, through his word, and in the experience of life, is trying to teach us something important. Will we listen? The thing is this; the life of our spirit is eternal, and as such, it is infinitely more important than the life of the flesh.  Our challenge is to focus more on our spirit.  This can be difficult in the midst of this often wonderful, physical, material, sensual life. Lives, which in the present seem durable, while rapidly slipping away.

To discover the spiritual kingdom of God that exists in our very midst, is difficult, especially in the affluence of consumerism. If we have too much, we cling to it, and if we don’t have enough, we either focus our energies to fight for what we want, or we acquiesce. Whether we compete or accede, we become followers of the world order; caught up in the desperate struggle to prove our worth. Or perhaps we give in to hopelessness, believing we have no value.

Surprisingly (as my wonderful wife Heather pointed out after returning from a mission trip to Haiti), in less prosperous economies, people can find true joy even in the midst of poverty. What a lesson that is! Perhaps in cultures that have not bowed down to the false gods of prosperity and self, it is easier to discover and experience the one true God. It is quite disturbing, that in this great land of freedom, an oppressor lurks. It is the false hope of prosperity and fame, that fans the flames of our idolatry. When this dwells within our spirits and our minds, and if we do not resist, then the things we think will bring us freedom and happiness, eventually will enslave us in despair, or worse, eternal separation from God.

Fortunately, it is by the blood of Jesus, the Lamb of God, that we have the power to be released from the treachery of oppression. By placing our treasures, titles and trophy’s at the foot of the throne of Jesus, we receive deliverance as God’s Holy Spirit leads us into a different life. This is the beginning of the eternal life that starts in the throne room of a celestial kingdom with our confession of faith. And it is by the sacrificial blood of Jesus alone that we are all able to enter into the presence of God despite our imperfections and poor choices — no matter what they are.

Then the Angel showed me the river of the water of life, as clear as crystal, flowing from the throne of God and of the Lamb –Revelation 22:1

God, thank you for sparing me from the death I deserve under the law. By the blood of your Son, your rath has passed over me and delivered me from my unrighteous path. I pray that you would be the focus of my thoughts, words and deeds. And in these things I would always bring glory to you — that my life would forever point the way to you. Amen.

Hard Hearts

Guardian Sphinx guarding the tombs of the pharaohs in Giza. Cairo Egypt

Exodus 10; Luke 13; Job 28; 1 Corinthians 14

God’s plan to deliver his people out of Egypt is first revealed in Exodus 7:1-5, which we read this past Wednesday.

And the Lord said to Moses, “See, I have made you like God to Pharaoh, and your brother Aaron shall be your prophet. You shall speak all that I command you, and your brother Aaron shall tell Pharaoh to let the people of Israel go out of his land. But I will harden Pharaoh’s heart, and though I multiply my signs and wonders in the land of Egypt, Pharaoh will not listen to you. Then I will lay my hand on Egypt and bring my hosts, my people the children of Israel, out of the land of Egypt by great acts of judgment. The Egyptians shall know that I am the Lord, when I stretch out my hand against Egypt and bring out the people of Israel from among them.”

Today’s passage in Exodus 10:1-2 begins this way:

Then the Lord said to Moses, “Go in to Pharaoh, for I have hardened his heart and the heart of his servants, that I may show these signs of mine among them, and that you may tell in the hearing of your son and of your grandson how I have dealt harshly with the Egyptians and what signs I have done among them, that you may know that I am the Lord.”

As I’ve studied the story of Moses, Pharaoh and the plagues this week, I keep dwelling on God’s words, “I will harden [have hardened] Pharaoh’s heart”.  This theme starts in Exodus 7 and is repeated through plague 10, the Death of the First Born.  Why would God do this?  It seems so uncharacteristic of what we know about Him.

“For I have no pleasure in the death of anyone, declares the Lord God, so turn, and live, Ezekiel 18:32

This is good, and it is pleasing in the sight of God our Savior, who desires all men to be saved and come to the knowledge of the truth, I Timothy 2:3-4.

Exodus 9:16 makes it clear why God chose this path, “But for this purpose I have raised you up, to show you my power, so that my name may be proclaimed in all the earth.” To demonstrate God’s power and that his name is proclaimed throughout the earth makes sense, but it doesn’t resolve the inconsistency.  How do you reconcile God’s desire to have all men saved with an action to intentionally harden someone’s heart, which ultimately inhibits salvation?

I think Exodus 8 reveals Pharaoh actually made the choice himself. Exodus 8:15, But when Pharaoh saw that there was a respite, he hardened his heart and would not listen to them, as the Lord had said.  Exodus 8:32, But Pharaoh hardened his heart this time also, and did not let the people go. Once his choice was made, God carried out his plan and allowed Pharaoh to affirm his choice on several occasions.

This isn’t how I want things to happen. I often find myself asking God to prevent me from making a bad choice, then saving me from the accompanying consequences. However, sometimes God chooses a different path.  Sometimes he uses our sinful choices to achieve his purposes.

Jump forward to the parable of the Fig tree we read about in Luke 13:6-9 today, do you see similarities?

And he told this parable: “A man had a fig tree planted in his vineyard, and he came seeking fruit on it and found none. And he said to the vinedresser, ‘Look, for three years now I have come seeking fruit on this fig tree, and I find none. Cut it down. Why should it use up the ground?’ And he answered him, ‘Sir, let it alone this year also, until I dig around it and put on manure. Then if it should bear fruit next year, well and good; but if not, you can cut it down.’”

If God is represented by the vineyard owner in this parable, Jesus is the vinedresser and we are the vines. God shows mercy on us, gives us time to come to him with repentant hearts.  God’s mercy is the picture of Him we want to see.

The Lord is not slow to fulfill his promise as some count slowness, but is patient toward you, not wishing that any should perish, but that all should reach repentance, 2 Peter 3:9

God’s patience will eventually come to an end.  Like Pharaoh, we must not give in to the lure of sin and let our hearts become hardened or we risk God’s wrath (being cut down by the vinedresser).  Again, this is not the picture of Him we want to see, but a reality we must accept.

Romans 2:5, But because of your hard and impenitent heart you are storing up wrath for yourself on the day of wrath when God’s righteous judgment will be revealed.

Will you join me today and repent of your sinfulness? Confess your need for Jesus.  Ask God to fill your heart with a desire for him.



Today’s readings: Exodus 9; Luke 12; Job 27; 1 Corinthians 13

The Merriam-Webster definition of distinction includes the following:

  • a noticeable difference between things or people
  • the separation of people or things into different groups

Today’s reading contains several distinctions.  The Bible is rich with distinctions so that it can become clearer to us as to who we are, who God is, and what he expects of our lives here on Earth.

In order to understand the distinction, we need to understand the reason behind it; why God is saying what he is saying or doing what he is doing. Notice that in Exodus 9:1, God doesn’t say “Let my people go, that they may (be happy, spend time with their families, have a party, go to work, relax, eat, drink and be merry, complete their chores, farm the fields, tend to the livestock, etc.). His purpose in rescuing them was so that they (we) may serve him.

Then the Lord said to Moses, “Go in to Pharaoh and say to him, ‘Thus says the Lord, the God of the Hebrews, “Let my people go, that they may serve me. (Exodus 9:1)

God made a distinction by revealing his will and by saving the livestock of Israel. He was showing them that he had set apart the people of Israel.

But the Lord will make a distinction between the livestock of Israel and the livestock of Egypt, so that nothing of all that belongs to the people of Israel shall die.” (Exodus 9:4)

There is no one like God, he is holy, he is set apart, he is distinct and he wants us to know it. If there were someone or something like him, we would be confused as to who or what to worship, to bow down to, to humble ourselves out of reverence and awe. We need not be confused, there is no one like him.

For this time I will send all my plagues on you yourself, and on your servants and your people, so that you may know that there is none like me in all the earth.

Distinction: Those who feared the word of the Lord, and those who did not. Isn’t it easy to put ourselves in the position of those who paid attention to the word of the Lord and wonder why some people didn’t? Weren’t they there (or at least aware) when the water turned to blood, and the frogs, gnats, and flies plagued Egypt, the livestock died, and everyone had the nasty boils?

After wondering about those who didn’t pay attention I came to realize that I do not always treat him with the appropriate level of fear nor do I always pay attention and obey. I forget or marginalize what God has done on this earth, the source of the beauty of nature, the smell of a spring morning, or even to the magnitude of what Christ did for me on the cross. I too leave my livestock in the field.

Then whoever feared the word of the Lord among the servants of Pharaoh hurried his slaves and his livestock into the houses, but whoever did not pay attention to the word of the Lord left his slaves and his livestock in the field. (Exodus 9:20-21)

Distinction: Acknowledgement or denial of Christ. If I do not acknowledge him, am I inherently denying him? It would seem very odd to be friends with someone for a period of time and not acknowledge to the person the fact that I’m married and have children. These people bring me joy.

Similarly to my relationship with Jesus, if I’m not actively acknowledging him before others, I believe I’m inherently denying him. What are the reasons we don’t share (acknowledge) Jesus? I typically correlate this to fear and/or lack of a sound relationship. Jesus tells us not to fear so I need to trust that part, and he’s calling us each day to have a relationship with him, so this part is up to us to act.

And I tell you, everyone who acknowledges me before men, the Son of Man also will acknowledge before the angels of God, but the one who denies me before men will be denied before the angels of God. (Luke 12:8-9)

Jesus is coming back, and because of that, we must be ready for his return. This parable makes the distinction between people who are eagerly ready for his return and those who are not. Some severe stuff, especially for those of us who have received and believed the truth, but haven’t acted on that belief.

Blessed are those servants whom the master finds awake when he comes. Truly, I say to you, he will dress himself for service and have them recline at table, and he will come and serve them. (Luke 12:37)

But if that servant says to himself, ‘My master is delayed in coming,’ and begins to beat the male and female servants, and to eat and drink and get drunk, the master of that servant will come on a day when he does not expect him and at an hour he does not know, and will cut him in pieces and put him with the unfaithful. (Luke 12:45-46)

1 Corinthians 13 distinctly separates love from a lack of love. Today’s reading had a few occurrences that called out wealth and possessions, and where they stand in our lives. The main difference boils down to the object of our love; the things of this world, or God and people. We can possess fine speech, wisdom, and even faith but without love, all of these possessions are meaningless. We can be generous with our possessions but if the intent in the generosity is for something other than love, we gain nothing.

And if I have prophetic powers, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have all faith, so as to remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. If I give away all I have, and if I deliver up my body to be burned, but have not love, I gain nothing. (1 Corinthians 13:2-3)

Jesus’ life, death, burial, and resurrection was the ultimate distinction. No one else has ever, or will ever do this. He did it to save us from sin, so that we can be distinct in eternity with him, should we choose to follow him, to love him, and obey him.

Who am I?

Exodus 8; Luke 11; Job 25–26; 1 Corinthians 12

Have you ever read a Bible story from the other point of view? I am betting that when you read today’s Word, you chose one, or two of the characters to identify with. Take Exodus 8, for example. When I read it, I am Aaron or Moses, of course. Why? Because Pharaoh is an idiot. He intentionally sabotages the work of God for his own gain. I want to be on God’s side, so I stay as far away from Pharaoh as possible. Until, I intentionally read the story as Pharaoh.

Like Pharaoh, all of us will experience pain and discomfort in our lives. Now, we probably will not experience the stink of dead frogs gathered in heaps, or swarms of flies, but we will have something from which we need relief. What do we do? We turn to God. We ask him for relief, for help and for provisions. When real desperation shows up, we begin to offer God anything that he wants. We will do whatever it takes, if he would just take it away. And then it’s gone.  The pain subsides.

The true test of our lives shows up not just in the time of distress, but also in the time of relief. Like Pharaoh, it is easy for me to commit to God when I need something.  I know deep down that he can provide it. The hard part is maintaining that faith when I don’t need him. This is exactly what happens in verse 15. As soon as there was relief from the frogs, Pharaoh moved his own direction and worked toward his own gain.

So am I like Pharaoh or Aaron and Moses? I know what I want the answer to be, but I am afraid of what the answer is. The realization that there is darkness in my heart leaves me with two options. The first leads to a dark place that I’d prefer not to talk about, the other is filled with grace and love. It is at the foot of the cross. It is a reminder that even though I have sinned, I have hope. I have hope, I am given new life, because of one sacrifice that was perfect and complete.

Spiritual Authority

Today’s reading: Exodus 7; Luke 10; Job 24; 1 Corinthians 11

February 24th, 2016

When Pharaoh shall speak unto you, saying, Shew a miracle for you: then thou shalt say unto Aaron, Take thy rod, and cast it before Pharaoh, and it shall become a serpent. – Genesis 7:9

Spiritual Authority

When I used to read this I would think, “Why would God associate with a serpent? Aren’t they bad, like Garden of Eden bad? Why choose this as a miracle?” When posing these types of questions about the Exodus event to a good friend and he pointed me in the right direction and encouraged me to make a study of finding answers. Here are some of the answers I found in my studies.

Why turn the rod in to a serpent? Why a serpent? Have you ever seen Pharaoh’s headdress? Recall the cobra at the crown of Pharaoh’s head. In Egyptian culture the serpent represented spiritual authority. The serpent on Pharaoh’s headdress was a statement that he held supreme spiritual authority. When Moses turns the rod into a serpent it is much more than a miracle, it is a statement that Moses through God had the spiritual authority. Pharaoh’s whole existence was based on the fact that he was god. The one and only true God sent Moses to put Pharaoh in his place. I have come to believe that this was a statement and a warning of things to come. 

Why I AM WHO I AM? When Moses asks God who to say sent him, God says tell them I AM sent you. According to ancient Egyptian culture and beliefs there was one god who was self existent, whom all the other gods came from, and who was the king of their gods, they called him Amun. I AM is from the Hebrew יְהֹוָה meaning “I am the existing one”. Or put another way, nothing besides myself contributed to my existence. So when Moses called out to Pharaoh that I AM says let My people go. Pharaoh, though through a perverted form of the undeniable truth, knew to pay attention. 

Why the 10 plagues that were chosen? One of my friends likes to refer to the 10 plagues as the 10 smack downs. Let me explain his titling. The 10 plagues start off with turning the Nile to blood. Interestingly enough the Egyptians worshiped gods such as Khunum, the god and guardian of the Nile. The plagues continue on picking off Egypt’s top gods one after another and in groupings. For example, there were several prominent Egyptian gods associated with the Nile. The more I study them alongside the plagues the more amazing the event becomes. God has all the authority and He did not leave a shred of doubt to that end. The 10 plagues end with two of the most affront attacks on Egyptian beliefs. The 9th plague is directed toward two Egyptian gods, or rather one combined god. Amun and Ra combined to Amun-Ra. Amun, mentioned above, was believed to be the creator of all other gods and the king of the gods. He was somehow combined with Ra, the god of the sun, to form a some sort of super false god, Amun-Ra. The 9th plague blotted out the sun, as if to say “I AM is here to say your mega super false god does not have any spiritual authority.” Lastly, the 10th plague targets the god who is most real and most highly worshiped to the Egyptian people, Pharaoh himself. Considered to be the son of Ra, this plague takes the next in line, cutting off the linage of the people’s greatest connection to their gods.

A bit of history. Interestingly enough, in 1400 BC, about 50 or so years after the last plague, Pharaoh Akhenaten changed Egypt into a monotheistic culture claiming there was only one true god and pointing to a “war” among the true god and the other 1,000 plus false gods, in which the false gods were destroyed. Temples and statues of the false gods were abandoned and even destroyed. A new city was built and dedicated to this one true god. No images of the god were allowed to be created. No worshiping of the other false gods was allowed, with strict enforcement in the new Egyptian capital city.

Amidst other societal and political pressures many high standing priests lost their power. After Pharaoh Akhenaten died and his second son, Pharaoh Tutankhamun, or perhaps you, as I, know him, King Tut, took power, working with his advisors they returned the Egyptian people to their polytheism roots. But the history of Egyptian culture’s brief encounter with a monotheistic belief structure remains. The more I study the history behind this event, the more I find that the truth cannot be denied. 


Lose Yourself

Today’s Reading: Exodus 6; Luke 9; Job 23; 1 Corinthians 10

In today’s reading Jesus tells his disciples to take nothing with them but to go proclaim the word and heal.  Jesus assured them that he would provide at all times. This same assurance he has given to us today.  Sometimes in our own personal lives when the day has been long, stressful, and has you running all over the place its reassuring to take a breathe and know God will provide all we need.  God cares for us.

 1 Peter 5:7 says to cast all your anxieties on him, because he cares for you.

In Luke 9 after a long day of speaking and healing Jesus was not ready to just send people away. He provided food to 5,000 people that were hungry. (There was even left-overs).  When the disciples were ready to call it a night, Jesus was focused on everyone else needs.  He is always focused on us in every aspect of our life the physical as well as the spiritual.

Matthew 20:28 the Son of Man came not to be served but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many.

What an amazing example for us and how we can live our life.  The next verse is one of my pocket versus (literally).

Luke 9:23 If anyone would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me. 24 For whoever would save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for my sake will save it. 25 For what does it profit a man if he gains the whole world and loses or forfeits himself?

I carry this verse around with me in my back pocket along with a few others because it is a reminder to submit my life to Him at all times. Putting aside my own selfish desires that I lived with for many years. I still struggle with selfishness but prayerfully look to God now as much as I can. I will continue to pray along this journey as we live our life for His purposes. In my own experiences when I’m doing things for myself and not for God’s kingdom I’m often hurting myself or others and ultimately hurting God when he has asked us to “follow me”. Our testimony’s are amazing examples of the divine plan he has for our lives when we submit to him. Am I willing to deny myself and my ambitions to take up my cross and follow him? Following Jesus is easy when life is going good; our true commitment to Him is revealed during trials. Here are a few questions to ponder.

  • Would I still follow Jesus if it meant losing friends?
  • Would I follow Jesus if I lost a family member?
  •  Would I still follow Jesus if it meant those uncomfortable conversations with family?
  •  Would I still follow Jesus if it meant the loss of my reputation?
  • Would I still follow Jesus if it meant losing my job?
  •  Would I still follow Jesus if it meant losing my life?

Luke 9:59 – 62 says “Follow me.” But he said, “Lord, let me first go and bury my father.” 60 And Jesus[g] said to him, “Leave the dead to bury their own dead. But as for you, go and proclaim the kingdom of God.” 61 Yet another said, “I will follow you, Lord, but let me first say farewell to those at my home.” 62 Jesus said to him, “No one who puts his hand to the plow and looks back is fit for the kingdom of God.”

Dear God, I know you love me where I’m at and I often have a “but let me” attitude when you want me to do something. I ask to give me a total dedication life to you God that you deserve. I know I’m not always dedicated like I know I should be please give me your courage, strength, and guidance to “take up my cross” and give my life to you daily. When facing various trials remind me that in Psalms 16:5 you say  Lord, are all I have, and you give me all I need; my future is in your hands.  God, in Philippians 3:13 you remind us to keep our faith in you. “Brothers, I do not consider that I have made it my own. But one thing I do: forgetting what lies behind and straining forward to what lies ahead, I press on toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus”.


Sowing Seeds

Today’s reading: Exodus 5; Luke 8; Job 22; 1 Corinthians 9


I’m Jillian, the newest collaborator on your Bible Journal team. A few weeks ago I met two of your fearless members, Jon and BJ at a Metcalf school fundraiser. One glass of wine later I was agreeing to join the Bible Journal! I’ve been getting to know each of you through your journal entries this week. Now it’s time for me to share our story with you.

My husband Lynden and I were married in 2008. I was raised very Catholic. From grade school to grad school I attended Catholic institutions. In 2010 we had our first child. Our son Oliver was born a seemingly healthy happy infant. Our life took a dramatic turn when Ollie was 6 weeks old. What began as just the “flu” quickly turned into something much more serious. Within a few days Ollie was at Children’s in Peoria unable to absorb any nutrition via mouth or IV. For six long weeks we watched him spiral into heart and kidney failure. Doctors told us later they weren’t sure he would survive. I remember feeling lost, desperate and alone. A nun would visit me in the room where I sat alone holding him in my arms, unable to feed or comfort him. She would offer me communion and ask if I’d like him baptized. She repeatedly appealed to my Catholic faith, trying to reach me in a spiritual place but I was empty. Slowly our sweet baby improved and we returned home shaken and a little broken. Oliver required lots of care but eventually we got back to life as we knew it. As the days passed the fear and anxiety of the whole event passed too.

“A sower went out to sow his seed. And as he sowed some fell along the path and was trampled underfoot, and the birds of the air devoured it. And some fell on the rock, and as it grew up, it withered away, because it had no moisture” Luke 8:5-7 ESV.

 Lynden and I were sowing seeds all over the place, but our crops were withering. Oliver continued to have minor health problems that brought me to the brink of panic each time. I didn’t have the tools I needed to turn to Jesus for strength and help. In October of 2011, Oliver got an ear infection. Our pediatrician heard a heart murmur he had never heard before. He sent us to get an echo. Two days later we learned that our son has 2 tumors in his heart. His tumors are not operable; we cannot change it we cannot fix it. The next day I drove to work in a fog. I sat in my car on the corner of Empire and Vetaran’s Parkway, tears rolling down my face. A huge flock of birds flew past my windshield and I heard, “Call Amy.” Why…my brain said…no one can fix this. Like a robot I picked up the phone and called Amy Arnold, the mother of Libi, my patient at Easter Seals. Through sobs I told her of Ollie’s diagnosis. She told me to drive home and she’d meet me there in an hour.

Amy arrived at my house that afternoon with about 15 yellow note cards. On each she had written a verse to encourage me. She looked me in the eyes, held my hands and shared with me who Jesus is and about God’s love for us. I’ve been learning about religion and faith my whole life but I had never built a relationship with my Savior.

“And when his disciples asked him what this parable meant, he said, “To you it has been given to know the secrets of the kingdom of God, but for others they are not in parables, so that ‘seeing they may not see, and hearing they may not understand’ Now the parable is this: The seed is the word of God. The ones along the path are those who have heard; then the devil comes and takes the word away from their hearts, so that they may not believe and be saved. And the ones on the rock are those who, when they hear the word, receive it with joy. But those who have no root; they believe for awhile, and in time of testing fall away.” Luke 8: 9-13 ESV

 Amy gave me seeds. Real seeds that I began to sow. A few weeks later, I called and asked her if I could see her church.  From there I joined a Bible study and then a small group. A few years later, Lynden and I conceived a second child. We lived by Jeremiah 29:11, knowing He had plans for us and our family. In November of 2013 at 24 weeks gestation we learned that our daughter Ruby Mae had six tumors in her heart. She was born at OSF St. Francis on March 3, 2014 with 9 doctors in attendance. She came out smiling, screaming and breathing! After 3 days in the NICU we brought her home and continued this journey only God could have planned.

After Ruby Mae’s birth we sought more medical testing and learned that our children and one of us is affected by a genetic disease. This disease can cause tumors in the brain, heart and kidneys. It can also cause visual impairment and seizures. Prayerfully we decided that new growth in our family would be best achieved through adoption. Lynden and I have always had a heart for orphans and recognized this as Gods’ will in our lives. We vowed to raise our biologic children for a few years until their health was stable and pursue adoption when we felt led. We made plans to end our ability to have more biologic children in order to follow His plan.

In October of 2014 when Ruby Mae was just 5 months old, Oliver was hospitalized. I started feeling ill around then. And so…

“…As for that in the good soil, they are those who, hearing the word, hold it fast in an honest and good heart, and bear fruit with patience.” Luke 8:15 ESV

The full measure of our story was revealed to us. Our precious Nadya, the child I couldn’t dream of, or believe He would send us was born 14 very short months after Ruby Mae at OSF St. Francis before a slightly smaller crowd. We learned 2 weeks after she was born that she too is affected with 2 small heart tumors. Although, all three of our children are miracles in my eyes, Nadya is my gift. My living, breathing, sometimes screaming proof of Jesus Christ in our lives. She is my constant reminder that we are all broken, but the love of Jesus makes us whole. Perfection is not a worldly attribute, it is reserved for our heavenly Father.

I am humbly joining the Bible Journal family, so that I may sow more seeds in rich soil. Thank you for being kind and sharing this opportunity with me and our family. We look forward to learning more and growing with you in Him.

~The McGriff Party of 5



Trust In God

Today’s Reading: Exodus 4; Luke 7; Job 21; 1 Corinthians 8

After killing an Egyptian, Moses fears for his own life and flees to the land of Midian, content to start anew. But after about forty years, God calls out to him from a burning bush, encouraging him to become the deliverer of his people. Moses is reluctant of course, for there is much at risk. Not only does he consider himself ill equipped for the task, but he is rightfully concerned about his chances for success. Like all of us, Moses is inclined to lean on his own understanding, trusting his intellect and his feelings, instead of trusting God. But God shows him signs and wonders, and makes a compelling case. Moses then responds in obedience, and through God’s power, eventually delivers the Nation of Israel to the land of milk and honey — the promised land.

Most of us are not called to be great deliverers of nations, but we are called to help one another find deliverance from burdens and afflictions.  We are also called to point the way to God in a world that has often lost its way. We are not likely to encounter burning bushes, or have serpents that turn into a staff and back again. Still we are called to listen to God and trust His purposes and His timing.  Ultimately we are called to glorify God.

By observing Moses’s reluctance in the very presence of God, we can see how easily doubt and fear can hold us back from important work. Fortunately, God in His love for us, by His brilliant provision, is willing to show us the way, if we will just pay attention.

But God demonstrates his love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us. Romans 5:8

Unlike Moses, we have the full Bible, complete with the law and the prophesy which is fulfilled in Jesus. God’s word includes the well documented story of Jesus and how the truth of the gospel spread through out the Roman Empire and the Mediterranean. It paints the big picture of God’s provision for all mankind — for us. It is the story of Man’s struggle for truth and righteousness, and redemption, fulfilled in the life, death, burial and resurrection of Jesus Christ. For in this we have been reconciled to God — fully justified in faith.

Jesus answered “I am the way the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.” John 4:6

Not only did Jesus’ sacrifice provide the full price for our sin, He demonstrated a life that put God front and center.  He lived a life of serving others first. Through our faith in Jesus we receive the Holy Spirit, and in that power we are transformed to be creatures of God, not just in the flesh but also in the spirit. Though undeserving, because of Jesus’s death on the cross we are made perfect and holy to God. All we have to do is put our trust in Jesus.

Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come! Corinthians 5:17

God please grant me faith enough to trust you to take my life and shape it to your perfect will. Grant me the wisdom to discern your plan for me and the strength to follow it. May Thy will, not mine be done. Amen.

Judgment or Opportunity?

climbing helping team work success winner concept

Family: Exodus 3; Luke 6. Secret: Job 20; 1 Corinthians 7.

In my post last week, I talked about America’ obsession with being the best.  At this time of the year, the college basketball intra-conference season is in full swing, Rivalry Week is on ESPN, and I anxiously anticipate announcement of the field of 64 on selection Sunday in a few short weeks.  Not much makes me smile more than the CBS NCAA basketball jingle at 11:00 am before the tipoff of the first game of round one on Thursday!

While fun, the fundamentals of competition require a winner and a loser.  In other words, the best team or the game winner cannot be determined without some measure of comparability; something must always be judged against something else.  Someone always has to be second best in order for someone else to be first. This philosophy flies in the face of Luke 6.

In preparation for today’s post, I read Luke 6 last Sunday. Luke 6:37-38 has been on my heart all week.

Luke 6:37-38, Judge not, and you will not be judged; condemn not, and you will not be condemned; forgive, and you will be forgiven; give, and it will be given to you. Good measure, pressed down, shaken together, running over, will be put into your lap. For with the measure you use it will be measured back to you.

As we moved from Genesis to Exodus this week, we began to read through the life of Moses. What we know about him so far was that he was given up by his Levite mother at 3 months, then was adopted by Pharaoh’s daughter.  He was a Hebrew child in the home of an Egyptian.  Hebrews were slaves to the Egyptians.  Given his situation, how do you think Moses felt?  Do you think he was looked down upon and judged by others because of his heritage? In Exodus 2, we read about Moses killing an Egyptian. When Pharaoh learned of the situation, he threatened to kill Moses, thus Moses fled to Midian.  While not necessarily undeserved, this was another example of judgment in Moses’ life.

Perhaps these experiences give us a little insight on Moses’ reactions to God speaking to him through the burning bush today in Exodus 3. When God told Moses he was going to deliver God’s people out of Egypt.  Moses questioned, and displayed a lack of confidence, Exodus 3:11, But Moses said to God, “Who am I that I should go to Pharaoh and bring the children of Israel out of Egypt?” Can you identify with Moses’ self-doubt?  Have you been criticized or judged for something to the point where you no longer have the confidence to proceed?

As we get to Luke 6:38, Luke switches from words of instruction (do not…) to words of opportunity.

…forgive, and you will be forgiven; give, and it will be given to you.

Instead of what not to do, he suggests what should be done. Instead of judging or condemning, Luke puts a positive spin on the instructions…  Control your own circumstances, seize the opportunity to make a difference.  Don’t sit back and wait to be criticized, go on the offensive in a good way.

My favorite part of the passage, however, is the 2nd half of verse 38, Good measure, pressed down, shaken together, running over, will be put in your lap. For with the measure you use it will be measured back.

This part of the passage speaks to magnitude. Forgiveness and generosity will be “pouring into your lap”.  If we all tried to get ahead by forgiving, giving or blessing others, what would our world look like?  Imagine people trying to out-love each other.  Instead of the greatest basketball players of all time, what if our measure of comparability evaluated how much forgiveness we have bestowed on others and/or how much generosity has been poured in our laps?  Would you make it on the top 100 list?