Two Accidents. Two Decisions.

My wife and I recently took a long weekend to travel, enjoy some downtime, and visit some places we’ve never been. There were many highlights of the trip, such as easy flights, a scenic road trip in a rental car, great food, craft beer, and we met some nice people along the way. On the final night of the trip, we went to see our favorite band play a sold-out concert at a large venue. It was fantastic!

Upon checking out of our hotel the next morning, we went to the parking deck to retrieve our rental car, and something immediately caught our attention: A piece of paper underneath one of the windshield wipers. Not a good sign.

The paper was a handwritten note with an apology: “So sorry, I scuffed the front of your car while pulling out.” Fortunately, the person left her name (Wendy), address, and phone number so that we could figure out insurance, etc. As frustrated as we were that the car was banged up (eventually learning the damages were ~$1500), we were thankful that Wendy demonstrated integrity.

Less than two weeks later, our personal car was parked in a deck overnight, and the next day, we found the vehicle had been hit. The two incidents were hundreds of miles away, yet the same scenario – the front corner of the vehicle was sideswiped. Unfortunately, this time the other driver lacked integrity; there was no note, no apology, no accountability.

Think about the impact and reach of each decision. Wendy came clean and while it was negatively impactful from a financial perspective, she lives with honor and character, knowing she did the right thing – and best, when no one was looking. We are here on this planet for a reason, and each interaction, each choice, is an opportunity to live out that purpose either for God’s plan or deny it. As the recipient of Wendy’s honesty, I really wasn’t even upset about the accident. I was thankful and felt bad for her.

The other person left with guilt and shame. While this person likely felt like he or she was getting away with something, in the end, that guilt piles up, eats at us, and is tough to shake. As for me, it was a bit harder to forgive this person. I had some initial angry thoughts, “what kind of person…” but then saw this as a metaphor for faith and hope, and a reminder that we’ve all sinned so who am I to hold back forgiveness from someone who has hurt me – even those I don’t know?

Revelation 21 gives us a picture of what we are ultimately moving toward: a New Jerusalem, a Holy City – free from deceit, pain, shame, and brokenness.

Nothing impure will ever enter it, nor will anyone who does what is shameful or deceitful, but only those whose names are written in the Lamb’s book of life. (Revelation 21:27)

No smashed cars. No hidden guilt.

Until then, we live here, being shaped by daily tests of character and faith. Tests of whether we will tell the truth, take responsibility, and extend Christlike forgiveness, even when it’s undeserved.

So how are you being tested today? Who do you need to forgive? And where might God be inviting you to choose integrity – especially when no one else is watching?

Waiting, asking, and worn-out shoes

My old fitness training shoes were in serious need of replacement as I used them several hundred times over the years. They were quite beat up and well past their end of life.

Confession: I was tired of them, so even if they did look great, I’d have wanted new ones anyway.

Once I finally decided to replace them, the process was easy. A few clicks, a second opinion from my coolness-judging wife (she ruled in favor of “cool”), a quick double-check on sizing, and the order was placed. I couldn’t wait for my new shoes to arrive! Then the next day, an email confirmation provided the estimated delivery date: two more days. That would mean three more days until I could wear them to the gym in the morning. In our world of same-day or next-day delivery, this seemed ridiculously long.

The irony wasn’t lost on me. Those shoes had been past their prime for months. I was the one who delayed replacing them – yet here I was, impatient over having to wait a couple more days.

Have you ever noticed how easily this happens?

In that day you will ask nothing of me. Truly, truly, I say to you, whatever you ask of the Father in my name, he will give it to you. Until now you have asked nothing in my name. Ask, and you will receive, that your joy may be full. (John 16:23-24)

In John 16, Jesus is preparing his disciples for his departure and the coming of the Holy Spirit. He is teaching them to pray and ask, confirming they will receive so that they will experience joy.

How often do we get impatient with God when we don’t receive the timely response we want from our prayers? How often do we delay asking Him (or not even ask) about our heart’s desires? It is just like me with the shoes: The months of delay in ordering them were on me. What right did I have to be impatient regarding waiting a couple of days for the delivery?

What or who do you need to be praying for starting right this very moment?

This is being written from a heart that has been praying over a certain situation for a long time, where the answer is “no” or “not now”. While it has been frustrating and painful, one thing remains: the more I pray over this, the more peace I experience. This is teaching me daily to rely on Him: for His provisions, wisdom, grace, mercy, love, joy, and more.

Have my circumstances changed through these struggles? Not really, but I have, and that is what Christ is calling us toward: to grow closer to him and be more like him each day.

Bold Enough to Trust God

Would your friends, family members, or peers describe you as bold? Would you say you live a life marked by boldness in your personal life, your spiritual walk, and professionally? Questions like these challenge me toward reflecting where I am and the person I am becoming.

Many of us probably would say we are bold sometimes, and that we would like to be bolder.

What holds you back? For me it is fear: fear of failure, rejection, or embarrassment. And when I zoom out, I realize these fears are selfish in nature, and worse, they reflect a lack of reliance on God’s faithfulness.

And God blessed Noah and his sons and said to them, “Be fruitful and multiply and fill the earth. (Genesis 9:1)

This blessing is a fresh start after the flood and echos the same mandate God gave to Adam in Genesis 1:28. What stands out to me is God’s plans for us are always good (and often bold). He doesn’t command us to do things unless he is going to equip us to do those things. Who is bolder than our God? If he tells us to do something, we can surely be bold in trusting him.

Noah and his family were alive because they boldly obeyed God’s command through the building of the ark in the face of uncertainty and ridicule. Now, in their new reality, they were to move onto the next phase of bold faith to multiply and trust Him with whatever comes next.

Today’s questions:

  1. How does God’s steadfast love steady my fears in this chapter?
  2. What step of faith can I take?

As I read Genesis 9, I walk away with a deeper understanding of the magnitude of God’s plans for our lives. Too often I think too small, too short-term, and too fearfully, but that is not honoring to God. He loves us so much that he sent his only son to live and die for us so that we can be with Him for eternity. That is the God we can trust with bold obedience.

My “step of faith” is a renewed commitment to consider “boldness” (in Christ) through every situation this year. When sharing my faith, when it comes to small and big decisions, when I sense the Holy Spirit’s nudge to go forward, and when I think my way is better than God’s way.

Being bold isn’t always logical, and it isn’t even about sheer willpower because willpower eventually runs out. Jesus Christ, our Lord and Savior, was the boldest of all, following the will of the Father as he lived, died, and was resurrected. May we approach every opportunity in the coming year with such selflessness that those around us see the hope we have in Him.

Even when life feels out of control…

My family and I recently spent several days with my father who is suffering from dementia. His condition brings many hardships, including memory loss, lapses in judgment, confusion, physical instability, and even some erratic behaviors and emotions. We are also in the midst of selling his home as he and my mother are both in separate living quarters with the need for increased care.

On the other hand, the core of who my dad is has not changed – he possesses an unshakeable positive attitude, he is extremely grateful for all that he has, and he remains a committed Christ-follower.

As we age, life becomes seemingly more uncertain on a daily basis, but one thing remains: Jesus on the throne as ruler, savior, and King of All Kings.

 The Lord said to my Lord,
“Sit in the place of honor at my right hand
until I humble your enemies,
making them a footstool under your feet.” (Psalm 110:1)

Knowing that my dad’s future is in Heaven changes everything. We didn’t want to move him out of his home, however each “home” is temporary until we get to Heaven. His road here on Earth will likely become more difficult, yet just like his unshakeable positive attitude, his faith is also unshakeable, and his future home is secured.

The same goes for the rest of us if we choose to follow Jesus. Is your future home secured?

There is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus. (Romans 8:1)

Celebrate before the victory!

What season of life are you in right now? Whether it is the mountain top of peace and joy or the valley of fear and sadness, know that you are loved and God is using this season to shape you.

“I cried out to God for help; I cried out to God to hear me. When I was in distress, I sought the Lord.” – Psalm 77:1–2

Psalm 77 is written out of great distress. As the author “cries out”, we feel the deep despair and can even get a sense of hopelessness. We’ve all experienced the lowest of lows, and as I write to you today, there are things on my heart that have brought me to cry out, to ask God when will we be delivered, where do you want us, and what do you want from me in this season?

I was reminded of this today while listening to Pastor Rick Warren as he reflected on Mark 11:24: “Whatever you ask for in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours.” Pastor Warren pointed out that true faith means believing before we receive (noting that the verse calls for believing before receiving). That is hard when we are in the middle of the storm. Yet it’s in those very moments that God invites us to trust His promises even when they feel distant.

God hears our cries in both the good and the bad. He does not ignore us. He does not abandon us. His promises remain steady even when our circumstances shake.

No matter the circumstances, we can celebrate right now as the battle has already been won. Jesus defeated death for our eternal life, and that my friends is something to celebrate every day. I’ve found that the more I trust God through the storm – and even celebrate the coming victory, the more joy I experience once he has delivered me. The same goes for the contrary if my season was full of doubt, I wonder why I didn’t trust God more throughout.

Will you take the next step today to pray like Jesus called us to do? Trust God’s promises, he will never let you down.

Empty nest, full hearts.

After significant preparation, over a nine-day timespan, my wife and I traveled thousands of miles, taking multiple flights to bring our two sons to college in two different states – far away from home. We are now officially empty nesters.

This all comes with a rollercoaster of emotions and thoughts, and this is my attempt to take off the mask that I’ve been wearing through it all, and after returning to a quiet and empty home.

We have the satisfaction that we have reached a long-anticipated milestone. It was God’s plan and will for them to eventually leave the home to venture out and grow in wisdom and knowledge. For an eagle to soar, it must first leave the nest and learn to fly!

Along with the satisfaction comes gratitude as we reflect on our time as parents of babies, then young boys, and now men. We are grateful for these and more:  That we all know Christ and call him our Lord and Savior. We are thankful for our marriage, that we enjoy and love each other, and that we have each other through the ups and downs of this adventure. We are also especially grateful for the love and support given by friends and family who have checked in asking how things are going. I got choked up each time my wife would read a text from a friend – these are real friends, God bless each of you!

Our gratitude also results in joy for our sons, who were eager and ready for college. This time is many years in the making, and one year ago, we thought there was no way our youngest would be ready to go to college in a year. We were wrong: God answered our prayers for our son to grow, mature, and thrive academically and socially during his senior year of high school.

As reality sets in, there is no shortage of pain and sorrow. As with all of the beauty, there is also a sense of loss. There are empty bedrooms and artifacts left behind, the sports equipment that will likely never be used again, the high school yearbooks, and the boyish things that once meant so much are now symbolic of change. It is also painful that most of our sons’ grandparents are not healthy enough to fully embrace this next step with our family. Finally, one of the most impactful – daily meals as a family – typically the highlight of our day, will now be few and far between.

At the same time, there is a new sense of freedom. We see our sons maturing into men, craving and embracing their independence while also learning to accept the responsibility that comes with their choices. And for my wife and me, though our hearts feel heavy with the sense of loss, we are beginning to embrace what it means to have a calendar no longer defined by high school schedules – start and finish times, exams, breaks, sports, and ceremonies. We booked some travel for a few weeks from now, knowing it will be bittersweet but also a step into this next season of life together.

We know we are not supposed to worry. We are also human, and we are prone to ask lots of questions and wonder if we did the right things along the way: Did we teach them well? Were we the best parents we could be? Do we need to apologize for anything? What if he is unhappy at his chosen university? How will we make the best financial decisions in these expensive years?

Writing this has helped me peel back the mask and recognize the beauty of God’s plan and love for us, even in the silence of an empty home. And as I sat with these thoughts, here is the scripture that inspired this post. I read this as a prayer for us and other families going through similar and other difficult situations.

Dear Preston, Dear Peyton, Dear Amy,

14 When I think of all this, I fall to my knees and pray to the Father 15 the Creator of everything in heaven and on earth. 16 I pray that from his glorious, unlimited resources he will empower you with inner strength through his Spirit. 17 Then Christ will make his home in your hearts as you trust in him. Your roots will grow down into God’s love and keep you strong. 18 And may you have the power to understand, as all God’s people should, how wide, how long, how high, and how deep his love is. 19 May you experience the love of Christ, though it is too great to understand fully. Then you will be made complete with all the fullness of life and power that comes from God.

20 Now all glory to God, who is able, through his mighty power at work within us, to accomplish infinitely more than we might ask or think. 21 Glory to him in the church and in Christ Jesus through all generations forever and ever! Amen. (Ephesians 3:14-21)

A way out.

What tempts you? When I think of the word “temptation”, ice cream comes to mind, as I can think of places where I’ve lived or visited that had an ice cream store or brand with the word temptation in it. In a Google search on temptation ice cream, over 2.2 million results were returned. That’s a lot of temptation!

One thing I’m tempted by is snacks late at night. I sneak them, and I’m pretty good at hiding my habit. Unfortunately, I became too good at this habit and realized something needed to change. Tactics that have led to success include confessing to my wife that I love to sneak treats so that she can be on the lookout, and maybe more importantly, I commit or “pre-decide” in advance to staying away from the treats.

It is the same thing with pre-deciding for everything else, whether doing the things we should do or fleeing from the things we should not do.

On my heart while writing this post were some of the lyrics from the song “Do it Again” by Elevation Worship:

I’ve seen You move, come move the mountains
And I believe, I’ll see You do it again
You made a way, where there was no way
And I believe, I’ll see You do it again

Praise God for this promise and the countless times he’s given us a way out:

No temptation has overtaken you except what is common to mankind. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can endure it. (1 Corinthians 10:13 NLT)

So when temptation comes—and it will—remember that you’re not alone. Jesus was tempted, yet he never sinned, but fear not, his grace runs deep. Whether it’s late-night snacks or something deeper, God is faithful in the midst of it all. Pre-decide your response, lean into His strength, and trust that He will make a way. You’ve seen Him move before. You’ll see Him do it again.

He sees it all, and he still loves us!

When you were a child, do you remember your parents looking after you? Do you have specific memories of places, events, or timelines where you knew someone had a watchful eye on you?

For example, I grew up swimming all the time. Lakes, pools, rivers, hot tubs and so on. During that time I didn’t always look to see where my parents or caregivers were, but there was always someone paying attention. With this there was also to an extent, an amount of freedom to do what I wanted. There were times when I wanted my parents to be watching and then other times I didn’t want to get caught.

At this point in my life, I am longing for the days when I could have a meaningful conversation with my mother and father. There are things I want to tell them about my wife, my life, and their grandchildren. I want to hear their stories again about how they grew up, both the good and the bad.

Today’s reading: Psalm 33

13 The Lord looks down from heaven;
    he sees all the children of man;
14 from where he sits enthroned he looks out
    on all the inhabitants of the earth,
15 he who fashions the hearts of them all
    and observes all their deeds. (Psalm 33:13-15)

These verses should remind us that no matter the presence or relationship with our Earthly parents, our Father God is always watching us. He loves us more than we can fathom, and he wants us to call on him in the good and bad times.

What thoughts come to mind when thinking about the fact that God is always watching? Probably some mix of fear (like I shared about not wanting to get caught), and hopefully some sense of warmth and love because of the extent God took to purchase our salvation.

but God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us. (Romans 5:8)

If there are feelings of dread or fear, it is usually because of some hidden or unconfessed sin. This week, I took an inventory of my life as to the things that are hindering my relationship with God. I asked him to reveal my sins to me so that I may confess and ask for forgiveness. The many thoughts that came to mind were daunting, but there is so much freedom when we come clean and admit our wrongs to the one who already knows what we did.

“Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. Point out anything in me that offends you, and lead me along the path of everlasting life.” (Psalm 139:23-24 (NLT))

Let us remember that God’s watchful eye is not one of mere surveillance, but of love. Regardless of our memories of those who nurtured us, we can always come to our Heavenly Father for forgiveness, wisdom, grace, mercy, love, a warm embrace, and much more.

A “smoking” lesson at the finish line!

A friend of mine had significant work-related stress for several years. As part of that, he worked early until late – including weekends, smoked a lot of cigarettes, and didn’t take good care of himself physically or emotionally. Then, once the storms of his job cleared, he embarked on his wellness improvement journey. This journey included exercise on a regular basis, weight loss, and he quit smoking cigarettes.

My friend then set and achieved a long-term goal to run a half-marathon. I was really proud of the progress he made and the results he had achieved.

After the race, we talked about how it went and the journey to where he is now. During the conversation, I asked “Did you celebrate with a cigarette?” I was half-joking, but then I was shocked when he responded by saying “Yes, I had one at the finish line.”

After all that hard work, why return to such a detrimental vice?

Around the time my friend shared his decision to quit-quitting smoking, I read Romans 14 about “judging others” and I was quickly reminded of my internal response to my friend. I definitely unfairly judged this person. Was I loving like Jesus or was I filled with sinful pride?

Romans 14 focuses on believers judging other believers. While the examples include Jewish vs. Gentile traditions, we can still be prone to unfairly judging others today, and therefore putting a wedge between ourselves and our brothers and sisters in Christ, as well as our Creator when we in seemingly harmless ways call to question:

  • What someone wears to church (or anywhere).
  • How or when they pray.
  • Whether they drink achohol or smoke.
  • How they parent or educate their children.
  • What their worship style or tradition looks like.

The list can go on forever, so we need to pause and look to Jesus who was called a friend to sinners, he loved unconditionally, and in the end, he was the ultimate example of being unjustly judged. He was perfect and sin-free, yet he was sentenced to a brutal death on a cross, and he did this willingly as the most loving act in human history as a substitution for our sins.

From personal experience, I’ve learned that when I unfairly judge others, it often stems from a desire to feel better about myself. However, in the end, it only leaves me feeling more disappointed. We are all works in progress though, so let’s not beat ourselves up when we fail because we are loved and forgiven! Jesus didn’t define people by their shortcomings, he saw their value and their heart.

Who comes to mind today that needs your love instead of your judgment? Who around you has stumbled and could use a hand, a hug, a word of encouragement, or even an apology? Let’s choose to see people the way God sees them: His creation, deeply loved and cherished as His children.

Justified by Faith

The company where I’m employed is serious about its mission, and part of this involves giving back to our communities. For example, we’ve logged more than one million hours of community service since 2017. That’s a lot of hands and hearts working to make a positive impact!

Last week was our sixth annual “volunteer week” where thousands of team members joined to serve people in need. I was fortunate enough to be able to participate in one of the events, and it was fantastic! Everyone was energized, enthusiastic, working hard, and served with a smile. This was a great reminder for me as to why I love this company and my teammates so much.

While serving is a very important aspect of our company’s culture, it isn’t required, and it doesn’t indicate whether or not a team member is successful in his or her role. Serving is one thing, meeting the job’s performance expectations is another. I could serve 10 hours per week for a year, but there will be negative consequences if I am not delivering as per my job description.

Today’s reading: Romans 4

Romans Chapter Four has a similar theme as it explains that we are not justified by our works but by our faith. We can try to check all of the boxes when it comes to a list of rules, but what saves us is our faith in Christ alone. God’s “job description” for us isn’t a bunch of rules – it is about our hearts, minds, and souls being in a trusting relationship with him.

While I am thankful to work for a company that encourages service, I’m eternally grateful for the one true God who loves me unconditionally; all I need to do is trust and obey.