Today’s reading is 2 Corinthians 12.
7 So to keep me from becoming conceited because of the surpassing greatness of the revelations,[a] a thorn was given me in the flesh, a messenger of Satan to harass me, to keep me from becoming conceited. 8 Three times I pleaded with the Lord about this, that it should leave me. 9 But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me. 10 For the sake of Christ, then, I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities. For when I am weak, then I am strong.
2 Corinthians 12:7-10
As I’ve shared in the past, I was diagnosed with spinal stenosis in my neck in 2018. This caused tingling in my spine, loss of coordination, and atrophy and loss of strength in my right and later my left hand. I was recommend to have a spinal fusion at Mayo but by the grace of God was connected by my sister-in-law Kim through her sister Diane to a doctor in Pittsburgh who fixed my issue through 5 minimally invasive surgeries in 2019 and 2021 without fusion and its negative side effects.
By no coincidence I’m sure, 2 Corinthians 12 has been my assigned writing multiple times since 2018. Below is an excerpt of a writing from November 2021 after my 5th and final surgery.
Paul states that his affliction (we are not sure what that affliction is) keeps him from being conceited. Is this the case for me? I don’t know..maybe. I know one thing..I’ve been blessed in my life with some things I don’t deserve that unfortunately not everyone has…loving parents, a loving and supportive wife, four healthy kids, financial blessings, and a stable career I love. If I didn’t have some “thorn(s),” would I even think I needed God? I realize God had His hand on my life when he led me into the field of financial planning, rather than dentistry/orthodontics, my original dream career which I was ready to apply for at the University of Illinois, which I would not be able to do with my hand issues. If these surgeries were not possible due to modern medicine, I would be like the man at the pool in the Bible..paralyzed eventually. He led me to a surgeon and surgery options by His grace that were better than what Mayo even proposed. I can still throw a ball with my kids and type on a keyboard which is needed in my career. I’m extremely grateful for His provision through all of this. I’m also grateful these challenges are mine and not my wife or my children.
Most importantly, as I look down and see my puny, almost withered, right hand or need my wife Shannon or my kids help opening something or doing a button for me..I’m reminded what Paul says here in 2 Corinthians 12:10…when I am weak, then I am strong. His grace is sufficient and His power is made perfect in my weakness. It’s all that matters and all I really need in life. Ironically, as another Paul, my good friend and Christ follower Paul Kelly, stated the following to me recently in a text message dialogue after a sermon…
“My desire to be the best version of myself will never be good enough. So..it’s in our weaknesses that God unveils our greatest gifts..His love is incomprehensively good and although I’ll never be worth it…I will forever be grateful.”
Thank you, Paul…no truer words can be said.
I have never heard the audible words of God. But there are times where I have been 100% certain God was speaking to me through other ways. As we were pulling out of the driveway to go to Mayo for my consultation in the summer of 2018 and I was not certain what my future held when it came to my ability to walk or use my right hand, the song Even If by Mercy Me came on the radio. I broke down. It reminded me that God could fix my issues if he thought it was best, just like Paul, but if he didn’t…He was and is enough. Today, while my issues are “fixed,” I still have atrophy, weakness, and loss of some motor functionality in my right hand. As I stated back in 2021, the challenges I still have today make me extremely grateful for what I am able to do and how much worse it could have been…as well as how much different my life could have been if God didn’t lead me down my current career path. I’m extremely grateful for His infinite wisdom, provision, and plan.
Please read the lyrics to Even If by Mercy Me, as well as here is the link to the lyric video.
https://youtu.be/B6fA35Ved-Y?si=qZdheCOPt_gpYuid
Even If by Mercy Me
They say sometimes you win some
Sometimes you lose some
And right now, right now I’m losing bad
I’ve stood on this stage night after night
Reminding the broken it’ll be alright
But right now, oh right now I just can’t
It’s easy to sing
When there’s nothing to bring me down
But what will I say
When I’m held to the flame
Like I am right now
I know You’re able and I know You can
Save through the fire with Your mighty hand
But even if You don’t
My hope is You alone
They say it only takes a little faith
To move a mountain
Well good thing
A little faith is all I have, right now
But God, when You choose
To leave mountains unmovable
Oh give me the strength to be able to sing
It is well with my soul
I know You’re able and I know You can
Save through the fire with Your mighty hand
But even if You don’t
My hope is You alone
I know the sorrow, and I know the hurt
Would all go away if You’d just say the word
But even if You don’t
My hope is You alone
You’ve been faithful, You’ve been good
All of my days
Jesus, I will cling to You
Come what may
‘Cause I know You’re able
I know You can
I know You’re able and I know You can
Save through the fire with Your mighty hand
But even if You don’t
My hope is You alone
I know the sorrow, I know the hurt
Would all go away if You’d just say the word
But even if You don’t
My hope is You alone
It is well with my soul
It is well, it is well with my soul

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